F E M A L E

F E M A L E

By J.K. Williams

So sweet, loving and kind. A beautiful mind

Pretend to be a princess, handmade dresses

A heart so giving, such a joy for living

Things were great. Oh….shit, just wait. 

That doesn’t feel right. Stop! STOP! I have to fight. 

I can’t. Terrified. Hide it all inside.

Shame. So much shame. So fucked – myself I blame. 

I don’t want any of it! No period, no bras or shaving, none of that shit.

Disassociate from my fate. Disassociate. Disassociate. 

Never ending. The comments, stares, touches, the breaking and the mending. 

You can’t say that

You can’t fucking say that bitch 

Shut your mouth. You’re fat. 

Feeling so small, worthless, sick of it all. 

Everything is wrong. Just keeping plodding along. 

Nothing is right. Just get through the night. 

Broken nose, broken face, blood all over the place. 

I didn’t do anything. Why is this happening? 

Whore. Here’s some more. 

Teeth smashed and the house is trashed. 

Go to sleep. Wake up. Repeat.

Never taken seriously. Even if you ask politely. 

Silenced, dismissed. Be different…I wish. I wish. I wish. 

Punished for existing. Endless suffering. 

Suck it in, doubt yourself, never win.

Constant pain. Feel the damage to your brain. 

Lightheaded. Full of absolute dread. 

Reality is deeply traumatic. Shut up. Stop being so dramatic.

Harassed, raped, beaten, killed. Watch the blood spill. 

Lied to, misdiagnosed, gaslighted. Wish to be dead.

Don’t want to leave….need a reprieve

Heart shattered 

Body battered

Mind splitting 

Spirit weakening

Still here, jaw clenched in fear.

Our existence is not respected. Resistance should be expected. 

Warrior

Survivor

You’ll never fucking stop her


F E M A L E
By J.K. Williams

Written on October 23rd, 2019

This work is licensed under the Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International license. Copyright © 2019

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