To the men who love us, are you really helping us?

For females, being raised in and living among a society filled with porn and rape culture, constant male privilege over the subordination and objectification of us, male voices; government and big business, male desires, male wants, etc, creates a state of hyper vigilance in a lot of us. “When will I be confronted next? When will I have my safe-space invaded? When will I be reminded that I’m invisible, worthless, an object, powerless, disposable?” And it would be remiss not to mention the times people laugh, make jokes, or harsh comments when we are triggered by what we are constantly inundated with.

This is just in mainstream culture, everywhere-everyday forms of media that wallpaper our lives. Where a safe space can’t even be found in our own house if we choose, like the rest of the population, to relax in front of the TV or open some junk mail catalogues. As Julie Bindel states; “There is no such thing as a safe-space. Women walk around seeing images that tell them they are lesser than men on a regular basis. What is a safe-space for women? Our own bedroom with the door locked?”

“People don’t want to hear about how women think and feel. They don’t want to picture women as people whom others might actually have to negotiate with. They want “equality” insofar as they want the erasure of all measurable signs of women’s oppression (because let’s face it, these get a bit embarrassing). They do not, however, want this to come at the expense of being allowed to see women as whatever they want them to be at any given moment.

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